Last night I went to see Eclipse with some girlfriends. Emeline wanted to give me a manicure before I went. While she was working, they asked me why I wouldn’t let them go. Several of their friends had seen it, some even younger than they are. Why wouldn’t I let them go?
I explained the best I could, that parents make different decisions for their children for different reasons, and I had made the decision that I didn’t want them seeing this movie yet. My big girls are 12 and 10.
While I was watching the movie, I tried to imagine how I would feel if my girls were there with me. What parts would it make me uncomfortable for them to see? What parts would I want to shield them from?
There’s no nudity. There’s no bad language. There’s some violence, but not much worse than what you’d see on a Bugs Bunny cartoons. And, I don’t fear that after watching the movies, my kids will run away from home and join a vampire cult. So, what’s my problem?
My girls watch Andy Griffith and The Beverly Hillbillies, and occasionally some shows on television. I’m not against television or movies. I just am for guarding them against some things until they are older.
Kids are bombarded with teenage sexuality so early in seemingly innocent shows like Hannah Montana and iCarly. Sometimes I can’t even put my finger on exactly why I don’t like them watching, I just know I don’t.
I don’t want their young minds on thoughts of boyfriends, love or any other adult situations right now. Right now I want them to be children.
Some may say, your daughter is 12, when are you going to let her grow up?
I don’t think growing up means having a boyfriend or thinking about falling in love, I think growing up means learning responsibility and self-control. Some things should come before the other. It helps you make better choices.
On my sidebar, I (only half) jokingly say, “disappointing kids on a daily basis.” Sometimes that is what it feels like I do. I say no to cell phones for my children, no to television shows, no to certain movies and no to sleepovers away from home.
But, I say yes to a lot of things too. Yes to imagination, yes to painting with watercolors in my kitchen, yes to pulling out the fabric and creating whatever you want, yes to playing all day instead of school, yes, to painting my fingernails 4 different colors.
The big girls understand and expect me to say no to the baby about so many things. No, she can’t play with scissors, “MOM, she has scissors!”. No, she can’t walk on the wet floor. No, she can’t run free in the parking lot.
I say no because she isn’t mature enough to understand the dangers. And, that’s the same reason I say no to them.
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